Back on my own road

Have you ever been in a situation in which you gave yourself so much to others, that you put your personal goals and needs on the back burner, that you ended up losing the path that you so carefully chose and built for yourself? That has happened to me. I hear many people saying that I am a good person. A person who is intelligent, nice, polite, and always thinking about others. Well, it did reach a point that I strayed away from my original path for others. Life gave me many experiences that I had not initially planned, or even wanted, but I've learned so much with each one of them. The question that keeps haunting me is how to go back to the main road, to my path, and leave all of those who need my assistance or support?

It’s interesting. I said those who “need” my assistance or support. How do I know they need me? Maybe they don’t and I am the one who keeps this illusion that others need me. Maybe I want to be needed. Perhaps this gives me some excuse not to follow the path I chose. Helping others became my excuse not to help myself or complete those tasks that I, and only I, must complete.

I am an instructor. Throughout the years, I had to learn that after classes are finished, after the end of the semester, my job is over for a particular group of students. During the semester, there is too so much I can do. At the same time, I want to be there for each person until I see the “aha!” moment, until I see a smile. The same thing happens in my personal life as well. I want to be there for others, even when others are capable of solving their problems by themselves. This eagerness to help others has been consuming a lot of me, and my personal goals are still at the same distance from when I last saw them…

It is time to help myself. It is time to go back to that road that brought me here in the first place. The question actually is not how to get there, but how to stay there. This post is just a motivating piece for me. I helped so many. Now, I am ready to help myself. I am not saying no to others'. I’m just saying: not now; this is my time. I deserve it; I need it. As others say: I am a good person. It’s now time for me to be good to me too…